Friends and family want to help as much as they can. This is only natural. However jumping in too soon can be frustrating, especially if you want to give things a try yourself.
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Jean: There you go (places tray of drinks on the table)
Kelly: You know, it’s just so lovely getting out, it’s such a lovely day, I’ve just been looking forward to this for so long, I feel like I’ve been stuck in the house
Jean: I know you asked for coffee, but I’ve brought you tea, I thought that might be better for you
Kelly: Oh right, ok..
Jean moves all the cups of the tray, but doesn’t let Kelly help
Jean: I’ve brought some cakes though
Kelly: right, uh-huh, they look lovely
Jean moves Kelly’s cup away from her, then starts adding sweetner to Kelly’s tea.
Kelly: Oh no, I take sugar in my tea
Jean: Oh no, sweetner’s better for you, much better for you ….. (stirs cup)….there you go (hands over tea)
Jean: Would you like a cake, here let me ..
Kelly: Look, Jean, I can do things for myself, if I don’t start doing things for myself I’ll never learn.
Jean: I’m only trying to help
Kelly: Och, I know you are
Jean: There you go…. (hands over cake)
As you can see this did not work out well. Kelly was frustrated at Jean taking over.
Something to think about
- Has this happened to you?
- What were you trying to do at the time?
- Who was with you?
- How did you feel?
- What could have made it better?
Now let’s go on to see what would happen if the situation was different…